Pictures of Holiday Food

Mushroom stand. Most popular place at the farmer's market.

Christmas Eve hotpot. We're estranged from the Americanized side of the family so we didn't get to go to their party (and you thought I was whitewashed). I think they went to church or did something equally wholesome. Meanwhile we ate our shrimps with the heads on.


The Yellowcat made Christmas dinner. The effort included a two hour long internal argument..do you assemble the smoked salmon appetizers, forcing Asian people to consume capers and cheese, or do you set it out and hope people won't mistake capers for peas, ignore the cheese, and gorge on fish? Unexpectedly easy solution: The Yellowcat's family neglected to inform her that the guests were professional chefs. So that's why no one wanted to cook. . . At least they knew about capers...

Dessert: Apple Calvados Tart It's got that wow factor when hot, mediocre when cold. I made it extra sour w/limited sugar.

Someone needs to teach me how to pair wines with food.

Next stop: LA for 1 week, starting with the clambake engagement party!

Cold

It's cold. California cold.

Let me show you.

Back to Basics

You can move 500 miles, but you can't outrun your problems.

Car overheated. No one's home. Don't know anyone within a five mile radius. No, not even vaguely. Lonely dinners shared with the cat. Fifth time this year?

Luckily the fridge is stocked. So I cook. Meals fashioned out of the contents of the cupboard; that's how you learn to utilize every ingredient, take away the car. I imagine somewhere, there's someone who enjoys fixing cars but can't and won't cook. You and I, we should meet.

Basic Mandarin Orange Cake, in my one awesome Crate & Barrel bowl. It's one of those cakes you make for PTA meetings when you don't really want to go all out, but still want to be a step above the people who bring store bought cookies.

Cuz you know, all professional women can whip up a fine meal on a moment's notice. And if you can't, well, you and by extension your child can't keep up with the rat race. Epic fail.


Chocolate/peppermint cookies. If I see you this holiday season, this is your gift. Remember it's the thought that counts, and it takes a lot of effort to make icing with just a fork and bowl. And please don't give me that box of drugstore candy to reciprocate. Especially if the next sentence is, my wife/mother/girlfriend is an uber chef but she's too busy being successful at work to cook. SEE ABOVE SENTENCE ON RAT RACE EPIC FAILURE.


Chicken w/ scary foreign Madras curry powder and really old spinach, broccoli and potatoes reduced into mushy forms.


Chicken with really scary red Thai curry powder, coconut milk, same old broccoli, a can of mandarins and badly made rice.


Not pictured: obvious lack of skill in making Chinese food with kitchen stocked with Chinese ingredients and cupboard full of Chinese spices.

The Return of the Prodigal Jennmoe

Jennmoe Drama
Our life has taken on biblical proportions. Is that a sacrilegious claim? Maybe a bit. Almost biblical.

Moe at her last supper, 1 hour before departure.


And then we descended into the Central Valley, covered in fog that never receded, and returned to a land where its so cold the leaves actually change colors and all the shops close at 6pm. Because hell is actually frozen suburbia. C would add that Michigan is also located in hell but its in a different circle of hell.

A life lived once and then lived again. We'll be here, approximately 5 miles from where I grew up, for the next 3.5 years if not longer.

Intermission
People taking my apartment. If the link doesn't work, let me summarize: four people, 2 american eskimo dogs and 1 cat are going to stuff themselves into the condo. That's what happens when you use a third party broker to rent out your unit.

Jennmoe Comedy (Tragedy?)
a warning to all women...do not get engaged or married without first securing a job.

Jennmoe: help me get a job

Non-moe: aren't you getting married?

Jennmoe: we're not married yet and i have to get a job.

Non-moe: you're marrying an mba, you're set.

Jennmoe: i have to support my cat and create an emergency fund to put C into an asylum when i drive C crazy complaining about my lack of a job.

Non-moe: don't worry you're set. you'd just quit and have a lot of babies anyway.

Jennmoe: i don't want to sit at home all day, its like a prison or a zoo or maybe a fishbowl.

Non-moe: i have real work to do, you'll be fine you're getting married, your husband will support you.

Jennmoe: he's insolvent. im living with my parents. my cat has an eating disorder. help me.

(separately, with someone i dislike)

Non-moe 2: you know you're the most narcissistic person i know.

Jennmoe: the world does revolve around me, it has to revolve around someone and the universe has chosen me.

Non-moe2: one day you'll wake up and realize you're just a hollow shell and no one likes you. that day is probably tomorrow.

Jennmoe: 1 in 5 people has a mental disorder. im a narcissus, you're an asshole.

Non-moe2: and thats why i hate palo alto, everyone's so full of themselves, everyone's just like you, ugly, asian, unimpressive but you think you're some hot shit.

Jennmoe: hey maybe i do belong here.